House Hunting Woes

As I grow older in life, I find more things that I enjoy, and more things that i don't particularly care for. One of the latter is searching for an apartment to rent. It is always exciting to begin a search for a new place because its, new, fresh, hip-or none of those things. Craigslist makes these places appear extremely sexy, but most of the advertising is a crock load of shit. Pictures of places make them look like well finished immaculate palaces, but upon arrival one finds odd smells, textures, loiters and linoleum floors dating back to 1975.

Amongst the many irritations of apartment hunting are are the hidden costs that they don't like to tell you until you show up, then its just awkward. One of the show people today, or whatever their official title is proceeded to say, "ya, you pay for all the utilities, its like um 200 a month, so....do you like it?' I wanted to tell her no, and I don't like you or your fake tan either, but I refrained. Another thing is that all of these places tell you that you cant have dogs, but the house smells mysteriously like PetsMart. My main gripe with all of it is how tiring it is. I feel like I should be paid for searching for an apartment for myself. I prefer being whacked in the knees with tennis balls at my paying job. The best part is filling out the application and paying them to do a background and credit check on you. From my perspective, its up to them to make sure no bankrupt tweaker sex offender ends up in their property. I also wonder if my identity will be stolen when i put my social, bank info, credit card number, address, and vehicle info on a piece of paper for a place i may not even live in. Sketch much?

I suppose the moral of this story is that I should hire a real estate agent, but I don't have any money nor any credit established, so that option is off the table. I will trudge on attempting to find the ever illusive perfect apartment.......